Royal wedding fever is making us feel all gushy and googly-eyed at any mention of Prince Harry and Meghan Markle, as we get ever closer to the day tie they the knot. ( Lifetime, you're no help here!) But one story getting play across the tabloids this week made some marriage experts, at least, take their heads out of the clouds for a minute. Word is Harry refuses the idea of a prenup, just like Princes Charles and William before him.
“Isn't that sweet?” you might say. " Prince Harry and Meghan Markle don't even want to imagine the possibility of breaking up!" Err, maybe. There is no denying the body language and interviews that shows just how hard they've fallen for each other. There is also the fact that the Brits, even those oft-scandalized royals, don't have a big tradition of around making prenuptial contracts. But if you're contemplating your own marriage, you might not want to follow their example. As romantic as we want to be while planning a wedding, marriage is a much more complicated legal contract that requires some serious worst-case-scenario contemplation.
"Both of them are being blinded by love — and that's not a criticism, I just wince a little bit," marriage therapist Susan Pease Gadoua, coauthor of The New I Do, tells Refinery29 via phone. "Of course, everybody hopes it works out, but we've just seen too many cases where it doesn't, and then women are really sorry."
Although prenups are growing in popularity, they are about more than protecting the assets each individual earned before they came together as one, Gadoua says. The contract can help you discuss — as a couple — children, career goals, and other aspects of what you want your future to hold together. This might not be pleasant exactly, especially when it comes to discussing something like a social media clause that would prevent you from trashing each other online or to your friends.
“It helps couples identify the areas where they are never going to compromise,” attorney Ann-Margaret Carrozza told ABC News, explaining the social media prenups she draws up for clients. “You want to establish boundaries, what will be off-limits, what will be private ... what are the acceptable areas of your private lives that you want to post online.”
All of this is the opposite of romance, which is kind of Gadoua’s point.
"The problem is, even if you did a prenup from this starry-eyed, romantic place, you're not being realistic about the fact that life throws these things at you that you have no way of anticipating," she says. "Of course you're marrying because you love each other, but love is a really fragile emotion. Building a marriage, which is a very heavy institution, on a very fragile foundation, is always tricky. Love just doesn't carry you through some really difficult situations, including divorce."
While right now Meghan Markle is in the midst of the very rare and exciting process of becoming royalty, she's also about to do something many women before her have done. It looks like she will give up her acting career (she sees it as "starting a new chapter") to marry into the royal family. Though she will have plenty of duties to perform, if this marriage ends in divorce, would she be able to pick up where she left off as an actress?
Hollywood, we all know, is unforgiving to women who take a break and (how dare they) get older away from the cameras. Other careers aren't much better. If you leave jobs in technology, law, media, or just about any business that counts on being innovative to have children or follow a spouse to another country or town, coming back is a challenge and might involve a significant loss of income and status.
"Lots of women I work with have given up their careers [and then get divorced]," Gadoua says. "One was a newscaster, and she couldn't go back to being in front of the camera because she had been away for so long."
A prenup can offer both spouses a safety net to adjust to a new life after divorce.
The specter of divorce always hangs there and deciding on a contract like this might be a good way to align your expectations. As an engaged couple discuss the potential distribution of their wealth, it's probably going to bring up a lot of issues they haven't discussed in the heady first flush of love. It might even make them fight, just a little.
"I don't think anybody should get married without having at least one big fight, so that you know how to handle that conflict," Gadoua says. "If all they're talking about is feelings, then they're still in the romantic realm. They're not thinking about the practical aspect of being with someone for the rest of your life. There's so much more to what a marriage is."
For anyone reading who is already married and never took this step, it's not too late. Lawyers and therapists like Gadoua often suggest something called a "postnup." It's also possible to revise the contract as the marriage goes on and situations evolve. Love changes, and some married couples these days decide to do things like open up to extramarital sexual relationships or to live in separate homes without getting divorced. Come to think of it, those arrangements sound both modern and a lot like some other royal marriages of ages past.
Blake Lively does all of her own styling, which is a rare occurrence in Hollywood where most celebrities hire someone to source all of their looks for major events. Instead, Lively prefers to do it herself. “Probably because I have control issues and a big ego — that’s probably the honest answer,” Lively explained at a Barneys x Tod’s event in New York on Thursday, Women’s Wear Daily reports.
However, Lively admitted that she doesn’t do it completely solo. She often works directly with designers for custom pieces or have an assistant help her make calls and request the looks she sees at fashion shows. When you are your own stylist, you have to think ahead, apparently — at least by about two months. Lively already has her Met Gala look in the works.
According to People, this year’s dress is her all-time favorite out of Lively’s past Met Gala dresses. “They’ve already worked on it for 600 hours, and it’s not done,” she told People. “I just sent Lorraine Schwartz and Christian Louboutin my dress, and said, ‘Okay let’s do something special,’” she told WWD. “They’re making something custom for it. So it’s kind of nice, because I have a bunch of artists around me who I have direct relationships with. It’s sort of a group effort with that. I rely on people who do that for a living rather than outsourcing it to someone else.”
She didn’t go into any more detail about the dress, but we already know she has an impeccable sense of style. “I love design and I love fashion and it’s a way to be creative,” Lively said to Women’s Wear Daily. Rather than hiring someone to painstakingly curate her looks, Lively gets more involved with the big picture while leaving the details to her team — basically, living the fashion dream.
Jameela Jamil can do no wrong. Fans already love her portrayal of the transparently “virtuous” Tahani Al-Jami on NBC's The Good Place, but the actress isn't stopping there to win our hearts. She recently launched an Instagram account celebrating body positivity — and we can't get enough of it.
As Glamour writes, Jamil's relationship with body positivity hasn't started with the launch of this new Instagram account. Back in February, she started a Twitter thread on society's unhealthy obsession with policing women's weight that really struck a chord with followers and went viral. She even shared the same story on her Instagram story, where she included the same images and wrote: "Who gives a F-CK what weight you are? What is this toxic bullshit?"
From there, Jamil continued to make space on her personal social media accounts for body positivity awareness. She later shared a picture of herself, writing: "I weigh: Lovely relationship. Great friends. I laugh every day. I love my job. I make an honest living. I'm financially independent. I speak out for women's rights. I like my bingo wings. I like myself in spite of EVERYTHING I've been taught by the media to hate myself about."
Inspired by her posts, other followers began to write their own "I Weigh" posts to social media. And now, the growing "I Weigh" community has a place to grow and communicate with each other, with the official "I Weigh" Instagram account, which Jamil kickstarted two days ago.
On the account, Jamil shares submissions by others, where many use photos and text to share stories about how they "weigh" their self-worth beyond societal expectations of how they should (i.e., a scale). “I Weigh” highlights posts from people from varied backgrounds, genders, and experiences, making it even more entrancing.
All of this amazing community building has us asking one very important question: Is there anything that Jameela Jamil can't do?
Tristan Blake Coopersmith is a psychotherapist. She told Refinery29 about her experiences leading up to and after accusing Republic Records executive Charlie Walk of workplace harassment. Coopersmith is the first of five women who have accused Walk of misconduct during his time at Columbia, Epic, and Republic Records. He denies their allegations. The opinions expressed here are Coopersmith's own.
The Harvey Weinstein allegations unlocked a part of my life that I had left behind for 13 years. When I left Columbia Records and moved away from New York in 2005, I never looked back. I never talked about it. I never addressed it. I never healed it. I just moved 3,000 miles away in order to move on. After the Weinstein allegations were in the news, I felt an unearthing of all the shit I never dealt with.
So, I went to work on myself. I used all of my internal resources, and I worked with my therapist. I went to a crystal healer and my reiki master. I'm a licensed psychotherapist, and I have a women's wellness empowerment studio. I consider myself pretty equipped to manage emotional challenges. I did all this stuff, and I wasn't able to calm the experience I was having internally. I was having nightmares, flashbacks, and felt a lot of confusion. In November of 2017, my therapist suggested I write a letter to my harasser, Charlie Walk, and not send it. It's a common therapy technique that I have found helpful and cathartic in the past. It did nothing. I was thinking, this is just going to go on forever. So, I put my feelings aside.
Then, in January of 2018, I went to the Women's March in L.A. It was a profoundly impactful experience for me. I went to hear the speeches at City Hall. I have no idea what Viola Davis said, but I wept through the entire thing. I got a very clear download that I was supposed to share this letter. And so the letter that I posted on my blog, outing my former boss, Charlie Walk, is actually the letter that I wrote just for myself as my assignment from my therapist, with no intention of sending it. Vulnerability is what heals us. The impetus for sharing it was just about continuing a conversation. I have a 6-year-old, and I don't want him to grow up into a workplace where sexual misconduct is the norm.
When I posted my blog and shared it on my social accounts, I never expected it to become what it did. Partly because I didn't know that Charlie was now on a TV show, The Four, let alone that it was the last week of taping. I also didn't know that the Grammys were the night before because I'm pretty disconnected from the music industry these days. Two hours later, a friend called me and said, "You're on Variety."
It was incredibly emotional, particularly the first and second week after I posted my letter. The minute I pushed send into the online world, I felt what I had been looking for: liberation, because it was not my story to carry anymore. I felt so much lighter. I was surprised by the reaction. I didn't know that I wouldn't be able to answer my phone for four days because reporters were calling nonstop. On the other hand, I received hundreds of messages on Facebook from women and men, some of whom I knew, but most of whom I didn't, with really beautiful messages of gratitude. It made them feel like they were being seen, because they had a similar story with Charlie or with somebody else. It was wonderful to be able to spend the next couple of weeks connecting with other women who had very similar experiences; not coaching, consulting, or being a therapist for them, but holding them in their truest place of vulnerability and understanding. To tell them, I know what it feels like to go to work every day like this. I know what it feels like to have to deal with the aftermath of shame and soul shrink.
Every single person that I worked with at Columbia Records was a bystander. Every one of them, men and women, saw how Charlie behaved, and to my knowledge no one did anything, no one said anything. We tell kids in school all the time about bullies. We tell them, don't be a bystander. It's like if you see something, say something; if you hear something, do something, you know. That same concept needs to apply in the workplace. I got so many emails from men saying, thank you so much for coming out about Charlie. It was disgusting having to see him mistreat women all of these decades. And I'm like, you didn't have to see him. You could have done something.
When Charlie came out with his denial the day after I published my story, I was not surprised. Truthfully, my first reaction was to think, You're so dumb, do you really think you're going to get away with it? I knew I wasn't the only woman. I had dozens of messages from women who had similar experiences with him. All he had to do was say, "I'm sorry, I fucked up, how can I make it right?" Part of the problem is that in our culture we tend to not be taught to say I'm sorry.
There was a lot of love and a lot of support, but it wasn't all rosy. I woke up one day, and there was an Instagram feed called Boycott Tristan Coopersmith. My business was affected, and that was a bummer. My Facebook page got destroyed overnight. Men were giving me 1-star ratings. I had a 5-star rating and went overnight to a 2.4. I'm a small local business owner, and that stuff matters. Thankfully a friend helped me fix it.
Time's Up has been really supportive. I was connected with them, which I was grateful for, mostly on their PR side. I have not been threatened with legal action by Charlie Walk or anybody. I talked to one of their lawyers early on, as a just in case, but I haven't needed that. On the PR side, my phone was ringing off the hook for four days. One of the conversations that I'm having right now is about filling in the gap. There isn't anything for people's psychological and emotional needs. How can we support women in that way? If a woman gets paid out by a company, let's say $50,000, she can start over or go live somewhere else, but she'll be carrying all that stuff within her that tells her she's not worthy. I'm hoping to be able to be a thought leader in figuring that out. We need women to be empowered. We need women to be big, not small.
I feel really grateful to be a part of this movement. I think about how 10 years from now, my 6-year-old son will be be talking about this and see that his mom was a part of it. I feel proud about that, even though he doesn't know about it currently. I went public with this experience to help heal my soul and because it felt like the right thing to do. I also shared for the benefit of countless of other women in the music industry who have had to and continue to endure sexual misconduct in the workplace. It wasn't the easy thing, but so often the right choice and that hard choice are the same choice. In choosing that path, we experience a sacred solidarity that heals and inspires change.
The question of what to do next is something to which I've been giving a lot of thought. A lot of the work that I do with my clients and my students is on connecting with your inner voice, your intuition, listening to yourself, listening to your body, and then honoring that and being able to communicate your voice in all of your relationships. When something doesn't feel right, what do you do about that? How do you speak up for yourself? It all comes down to having a solid foundation of feeling worthy of being heard.
As an advocate against workplace misconduct, I think it is important to rise up in the face of fear. If we aren't talking about the wrongs of the world, then we are silently perpetuating them. I refused to be a part of the silence. The conversation must continue until there is no more reason to talk about it because every human feels safe, respected, and valued in the workplace. For social, moral, and political shifts to occur, we have to dare to be vulnerable. When we experience emotional trauma, we carry a story rooted in feelings like shame, sadness, grief, and confusion. On the other side of the experiences, on the other side of the story, is freedom. There are many paths to feeling free.
For women who are thinking about speaking out about their experiences or naming their harassers: Sharing your story publicly is just one path, and if that feels like the most effective, most cathartic way to freedom, then my advice is to wholeheartedly go for it. Share your truth in its purest form. Let your story and the pain attached evaporate so it is no longer your weight to carry.
Between its four fashion-y lines, the launch of Universal Thread, which offers a full range at budget-friendly prices, and a collaboration with Hunter, Target really is here to outfit you for every single occasion in your life. And now, just in time for swim season, Target has re-upped its offering with more than 1,700 styles to choose from — including an expanded assortment for all body types.
“It’s our goal to take the stress out of swimsuit season and bring joy back to the beach by providing something for every Target guest,” the retailer posted on its A Bullseye View website. “To show off the new styles you’ll see bright, vibrant images throughout our marketing campaign — all meant to inspire guests to have fun while rocking their favorite swimsuit. Something you won’t see? Reshaping or airbrushing. Building on the strong foundation we set with last year’s campaign, we’re celebrating women and encouraging them to embrace the beauty of their own bodies.”
Aside from the body positive imagery, it doesn’t hurt that the suits feature fashion-forward trends in a variety of colors, textures, and styles, including '70s-inspired prints and classic Americana stars and stripes. Prices range from $14.99-$49.99, but most hover around $24.99, which really can't be beat. Click ahead to shop some of our favorites, because summer will (hopefully) be here sooner than we think.
You always want what you can’t have — especially when it comes to beauty products. That’s why we’re getting the inside scoop from your favorite retailers on what’s selling out right now, how to sign up for waitlists, and where to go to find the next best thing. Because if everyone’s buying it, you know it has to be good.
These days, beauty brands use some pretty unusual marketing strategies when trying to get the consumer's attention in a crowded marketplace. There's provocative shade names, fandom-fueled one-offs, the whimsical use of unicorns, and, one of the biggest, comparing products to literal clouds. Sheer, weightless makeup and skin care is the trend du jour, but not all formulas are created equal.
Since launching back in December, the cream has sold out three times on the brand's site and Sephora (the third happened just this week). Thankfully it's has since been restocked, but if the product's popularity has taught us anything, it's that it will sell out again. In the event that it does, check out a few of our favorite lightweight moisturizers in the slides ahead.
In addition to rosewater, aloe, and white tea, Pink Cloud contains kukui oil and shea butter to hydrate dry skin. Thanks to its fluffy texture, it never leaves our skin feeling greasy. In fact, its softening and smoothing formula makes a great canvas for makeup.
Those with oily skin will love this lightweight gel moisturizer, which contains rose extract and willowherb to minimize pores. Like Pink Cloud, it's a great cream to slather on before makeup thanks to its soft, matte finish.
On the hunt for another makeup-friendly option? This primer-moisturizer hybrid contains tea and honey extracts to reduce redness and hyaluronic acid to hydrate dry skin.
Steph Stone is the go-to manicurist for Hollywood A-listers like Yara Shahidi and Demi Lovato. The following story was told to Mi-Anne Chan and edited for length and clarity.
When I was 15, I was diagnosed with an eating disorder. A few years later, I got accepted to a Disney college program in Los Angeles. I wasn't mentally better, but I convinced my parents I was well enough to move. Once I got there, I decided to stick around. For a while I was able to control my disorder because I was living with other college students — but that didn't last long. I became consumed by my sickness again and had zero plans. All my free time was spent binging and purging.
Then, I started to look for other ways to get skinny, and that's where the drugs came in. It didn't make the binging and purging go away — it just gave me new things that were ruining my life. I spiraled so quickly once drugs were involved. It depleted my bank account. Eventually I called my parents and told them I needed to come back home to Hawaii.
When I got home, I refused to tell my parents what was wrong. I couldn't sleep, so my mom brought me to a doctor. She prescribed me Ambien, but I don't remember her telling me that if you take Ambien and don't fall asleep, you end up hallucinating. I hallucinated the first few times I took it and I thought I'd lost my mind. I just wanted it to be over, so one night I took all of the Ambien and waited, just hoping it was the end. My parents found me and took me to the hospital. That's when my old friend Jenna Hipp came back into my life and I started my journey to finding nails.
Making It In Hollywood
Jenna is a successful celebrity manicurist who founded an agency called Nailing Hollywood. We grew up together in a Hawaii and she's always been like a big sister to me. While I was in rehab, she checked in on me every day, she sent me packages, and she said that when I got out, I should go live and work with her in LA. She was so adamant about it and made sure my parents were comfortable.
Jenna took me under her wing and I started learning about the nail industry. I took a break when I was 19 to have my son, but then I moved back to L.A. to start my career as a manicurist. I went to nail school, got certified, and joined Jenna's agency. At first it was a lot of networking and building my portfolio. I did a lot of web content and put my work on Instagram because it was free advertising for me.
My Big Break
I worked with a few celebrities at the time, but Demi Lovato was my most consistent client. She was on The X Factor back then and we'd change her nails with every outfit. She posted her manicures to Instagram and Twitter every single time. From there, other girls saw my work and it gave me so many opportunities. Demi really embraced nail art and it gave me a shot that a lot of manicurists didn't have at that time.
One night when I was doing Demi's nail art for The X Factor, she requested spikes on her nails. Nowadays you can go into any nail shop and find spikes, but at the time I had to go to a tattoo and piercing shop to buy 10 spiked barbell earrings that I could cut the spikes off of. They were so expensive, so I bought exactly how many I needed to do each tip of the nail.
As I was getting her ready, I dropped the first spike into the shag carpet. She said it was totally fine, but I was mortified. We had a room full of people combing the carpet looking for this tiny spike with magnets and everything. Once we realized we weren't going to find it, I just did three spikes down the center of her nail and she loved it. I look back now and I can't believe I was so distressed by it, but I was 22 years old and still so new in the industry. She was so gracious and happy. She asked me back the next week.
Working on set was one of the biggest confidence boosts, because I realized that the way things look in magazines isn't real
Smoke & Mirrors
When I moved to LA, my parents' biggest fear was that moving to such a stereotypically superficial city wasn't going to be good for me. Honestly, I wasn't sure either. But working on set was one of the biggest confidence boosts, because I realized that the way things look in magazines isn't real. I wish I'd known that when I was looking at magazines as a kid.
The process of getting a celebrity ready for a cover shoot is a long process. They have the best styling, there's two hours of hair and makeup, and there's a seamstress to hand-sew you into your clothes so that every curve looks perfect. The photographer is always the best in the world and there's a team of six people working on lighting so that every angle is flattering, too. All of these people are trained to make one person look extraordinary. People don't walk around everyday looking like a Cosmo cover. I think it's so cool that celebrities are coming forward and saying they don't want to be retouched.
It's so weird to look back and think about my sickness. Don't get me wrong, it still creeps in — I don't look in the mirror every day thrilled to see my body, but there isn't that intense visceral hatred for it. It's my body, I can accept that every body is different and we all end up in the ground the same way. Why should we ruin the most basic experiences because we can't love ourselves?
I can thank my son for that breakthrough. Becoming a mother, realizing that you have a tiny human to take care of, made me get my priorities in order. It made me say, Take this seriously. You have to become good [at nails] because you have nothing else. I had a child to take care of and I was given an amazing opportunity to build a career for myself. I told myself I had to succeed and that's what saved me.
If you are struggling with an eating disorder and are in need of support, please call theNational Eating Disorders Association Helplineat 1-800-931-2237. For a 24-hour crisis line, text “NEDA” to 741741.
If you are thinking about suicide, please call theNational Suicide Prevention Lifelineat 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or the Suicide Crisis Line at 1-800-784-2433.
If you are struggling with substance abuse, please call theSAMHSA National Helplineat 1-800-662-4357 for free and confidential information.
After a proper winter beatdown, it's easy to lose your sartorial mojo. For me, the resulting uniform around March looks something like workout clothes, a pair of sneakers I don't mind getting ruined in days-old snow slush, and a parka that goes with absolutely nothing (but at the very least keeps me warm). And trust, it ain't cute. But toss one hint of spring into the air, and it's as if I'm immediately cured of my funk and ready to reset for the coming months.
First order of business? Hitting up an always-on shopping destination, like Mango, for on-trend yet accessible staples. There, you'll discover an inventory stacked with delicate fabrics that mirror the sweetness of the season; transitional essentials like light trench coats, linen jumpsuits, and block-heeled sandals; and cute accessories to pull it all together. Flip through our must-haves ahead, and forget all about your wardrobe's five-month hiatus from bringing its A-game.
Inspiration, creativity, and great fashion sense come in all shapes and sizes, and Bethany Rutter's book Plus+ is here to prove it. The London-based fashion blogger and fat activist (formerly of Arched Eyebrow fame) has edited and launched a coffee table book that features over 100 of the boldest and most empowering plus-size street style looks from around the world.
Rutter was initially approached by publisher Ebury Press in the summer of 2016 and started working on the project about 10 months later. “I would never have gone to my agent about doing a plus-size street style book, because I just never assumed there was a market for it and that any major publisher would get behind it,” she admits. But people are increasingly demanding a better and broader representation of women and society, and since its release last month, Plus+ has been racking up positive responses for championing plus-size diversity and impeccable style for a wider audience. “There was a book published before mine, The Little Book of Big Babes by Rachelle Abellar, but that was self-published [and might not have been distributed as widely],” Rutter explains. “I think to have a book on mainstream sale has been really positive for a lot of people.”
Mixing up #BoPo leaders like Gabi Fresh and Nadia Aboulhosn with less established names, Rutter scouted talent outside of her circle too, looking for the fiercest shots: “I had to contact everyone and say: ‘Here is the photo of you that I feel is really cool and represents your style and plus-size fashion really well, I’d like to use it in this book,’” she says. She also collected personal quotes on fashion and style from each person to accompany the images.
Ahead, Refinery29 caught up with Rutter to learn more about the creation of the book, her aspirations for the project, and to discuss the current situation of the plus-size community in mainstream media narratives, and in the fashion industry, too.
67% of U.S. women are plus-size. Join as Refinery29 gives these women their own megaphone, doubling down on our commitment as allies, and partnering with them to catapult their powerful conversations into a true historic movement. #WeAreThe67.
What makes Plus+ different and how do you hope to reshape the conversation around plus-size? "I think what Plus+ does is show all of the different ways of being plus-size. We often get only one mainstream narrative about what it means to be plus-size and who to make the face of the plus-size world — typically, models who are really at the smaller end of the plus-size spectrum. I just wanted to say that that is not the only acceptable way of being plus-size and I wanted to create something that would genuinely be useful and make people of different races, ethnicities, and countries, with different styles, look at the book and be like: 'Cool, I am at peace with my body and with the way I dress,' or 'I feel inspired to do something different.'
"I hope for it to empower readers. I don’t know if it will ever have a big impact on the way fashion, or plus-size fashion, is perceived, but I hope it has an impact on the way plus-size women perceive themselves as part of a global community of amazing, interesting, diverse women."
Are you seeing any change happening in the market? "It does feel like we’ve never had more choice, like things are the best they’ve ever been, but I think that still revolves around a relatively small part of the plus-size world and that people above, like, maybe a US size 26, are still being really underserved. So yes, there is change, but I think it needs to be more radical in more directions. It often feels more likely that a plus-size brand would start doing non plus-sizes than extend their range above a US size 26."
What do you think is the biggest misconception about plus-size fashion? "It's probably that retailers always know best, or that they always know what we want. There’s still a tendency to make clothes for what used to be the idea of plus-size women: slightly older and slightly more embarrassed about being plus-size. But whenever we’re presented with something new, interesting, or more audacious, we’re really excited about it and we do buy it. As we know, a lot of the plus-size women of today are younger and it’s important for brands to reflect that. Basically, it’s about having as much variety for plus-size fashion as there is for mainstream fashion."
Courtesy of Plus+
The ‘plus-size ’ label has been sometimes criticized and rejected. What do you think about it? "I am very in favor of it, because I just think: 'How am I meant to find clothes if I don’t know where to look?' If I don’t have that label up there, how am I going to know which brands make clothes for me? Also, it feels like most of the people that criticize the plus-size label are people that are on the cusp, anyway. It’s always [US] size 14-16 models that are rejecting it, because they can. While I can’t. If I reject that label, I don’t know how to navigate the world."
Her memories came rushing back: José Daniel, her partner of 10 years, getting sicker by the hour during Hurricane Maria, both of them trapped in their second-story apartment as the street flooded. José Daniel being rushed to a hospital the day after the storm, both slowly realizing the devastation everywhere was worse than they thought. José Daniel in a filthy hospital room for over 45 days, with barely any power or even enough doctors to treat him. José Daniel dead at 46, the cause of his illness still unknown to this day.
Alone at home, Agneris had a major panic attack.
“As soon as the power went out, it was like going back to the days where he was in the hospital and I came back home to pick up clean clothes or rest,” the 34-year-old told Refinery29. “It was a trigger and I couldn’t stop it, even as I tried.”
But while the chaotic aftermath of the storm and the efforts to rebuild the island have been front-and-center, there’s another crisis brewing in Puerto Rico, though less visible. The Puerto Rico Department of Health found that in 2017 there was a 29% increase in the number of cases of people dying by suicide, and that calls to the government suicide hotline tripled in the last three months of the year. Officials said that Maria is likely to be one of the factors for both increases. Some Puerto Ricans confirm it anecdotally, too.
“Everyone I know has sought out help. My doctor even told me she has more patients now seeking treatment than ever before,” Agneris said. “It’s been so hard. We’ve all seen even the suicide rate skyrocketing.”
Refinery29 spoke with three Puerto Rican women about the mental health difficulties they’ve faced in the days after Hurricane Maria. Their experiences, while deeply personal, also paint a scene of what type of struggles boricuas have encountered since the storm and how they’re dealing with them in a place where there’s still great stigma attached to mental illness.
“The smallest things hurt”
In early September, Ana* expected Hurricane Irma to leave Puerto Rico in very bad shape. The San Juan resident imagined the storm would have an impact similar to Hurricane Georges in 1998, when her family was without water for three months. But the Category 5 phenomenon changed its course at the last second, and only a handful of areas in the island were affected.
Two weeks later, Maria was supposed to come around. And even though the government and the media warned the hurricane could devastate the island, the 25-year-old was skeptical.
“Part of me was hopeful that it would be an overblown, dramatic situation — like always. But part of me was like, ‘Oh, shit. This might get bad,’” she told Refinery29. “Nothing really prepared me for it, though.”
Ana has struggled with anxiety and depression most of her life, though she said that in September her conditions were under control. But the aftermath of Maria undid all her progress. She said the months after the hurricane have been perhaps the lowest point in her life.
Illustrated by Paola Delucca.
“First, I spent weeks trying to reach my family. And then, I was without power for months. So the struggle was trying to find food elsewhere — finding all my meals, because I couldn’t cook or refrigerate anything. I was also unable to go to work for a long time, therefore I was not getting paid so I didn’t have a lot of money,” she said. “I also ran out of my meds and I was not able to contact my therapist. I ended up spiraling.”
She recalls being at home all day, every day for what felt like weeks on end. In the evening, she would light candles in her dark apartment and spend all night awake, overthinking about her dire situation. And going outside during the day was just as traumatizing, since so many of her surroundings were destroyed.
“I felt like someone drained my will to live. The smallest things hurt,” she said. “Imagine not having food. Or trying to drink out of a bottle of water, and the water feels like it’s almost boiling because it was so hot outside and you didn’t have a fridge or ice. Everything weighed on me.”
Ana’s experience with mental health difficulties after a natural disaster is consistent with the research of Dr. Rebecca Schwartz, an associate investigator at the Feinstein Institute for Medical Research**.
After Hurricane Sandy hit the New York area in 2012, Schwartz studied the mental health impact of the storm among adults living in hard-hit parts of Queens, Staten Island, and Long Island. Participants filled a 30-item survey in which they answered how the hurricane had affected them — questions included whether they'd experienced displacement, damage to their property, loved ones who went missing, flooding, fear for their lives, and more.
“Increased exposure to the hurricane — the more negative effects, the more negative impacts the hurricane had on you — the more likely you were likely to experience symptoms of anxiety, depression, generalized stress, and most importantly, post-traumatic stress disorder,” she told Refinery29.
Her research also found that people who have experienced mental health difficulties in the past, like Ana, and those of a low socioeconomic status were among the most vulnerable when it came to experiencing symptoms post-hurricane.
Ana left Puerto Rico in early January and moved to North Carolina, where she’s been slowly trying to start a new life. She said that despite the uncertainty, she is doing better now.
“The change in scenery — going from a place where I struggled every single day without power to a place where I have access to basic necessities — has made me feel better,” she said. “I feel more under control.”
When she left, four months after the hurricane, she still didn’t have power in her apartment.
“He might have been alive if not for Maria”
The lack of electricity is something that comes up often in conversations with people who survived Hurricane Maria. For women like Ana, not having power was directly linked with the disruption of normalcy and her descent into a deep depression. For Agneris, the collapse of Puerto Rico’s electrical grid is one of the causes of her partner’s death.
A few days before Maria struck, Agneris’ partner José Daniel Sánchez Rivera had an ongoing fever that wouldn’t subside, even after being prescribed medication. Since he didn’t have any other symptoms, his doctor let him go home. But the day of the hurricane, his fever spiked and he turned yellow — a sign of jaundice, which meant he was having an issue with his liver.
“Knowing there’s someone sick in your home, and being unable to go out and seek medical help for more than 24 hours, was a nightmare,” she said.
Illustrated by Paola Delucca.
The day after the hurricane José Daniel still showed the same symptoms, so the couple got out of the house and went to a nearby hospital — which was partially destroyed. Unable to find phone service to contact the rest of their family, they were unaware of the magnitude of the devastation and made their way to another hospital in the area. After more of 12 hours waiting, José Daniel was admitted because his liver and spleen were inflamed. He would never go home again.
Agneris did her best to deal with the external circumstances while José Daniel was in the hospital. She said that she had bouts of depression and anxiety before, but her condition was under control with the help of her therapist. And she needed to do her best to stop herself from unraveling, even if she felt like it, just for the sake of her partner.
She said that Jose Daniel’s 45-plus days in the hospital mirrored the health crisis that developed in the island after the hurricane. The first hospital they went to only had a generator partially powering the entire building. There was no air conditioning, or even ice, to try to manage José Daniel’s fever, and things like doing blood work, a CT Scan, or MRI were out of the question. The doctors told Agneris that since his condition was not critical, he was not a priority for a transfer to a better-equipped place. After a week or so, they left and went to a different hospital in the area — one of the few with power in the entire island.
That didn’t mean things got better for José Daniel, however. The power was not stable, so sometimes there would be a blackout that interrupted the medical screenings and doctors would have to repeat the procedure, while warning them the results might not be entirely accurate. It was also hard to do blood transfers, the building was not always entirely sanitary, and even the food was at times lacking. Primary doctors and specialists were also hard to come by. According to Agneris, there was only one gastroenterologist treating all the patients in the hospital.
On Nov. 8, a month-and-a-half after Maria, José Daniel died after suffering from liver failure following a biopsy. Despite the countless studies and procedures, doctors were never able to figure out what was wrong with him. Agneris is convinced the conditions after the hurricane contributed to his death.
“Those first days in that first hospital — the ones we spent without power, without doctors, without being able to do procedures — were crucial,” she said. “He might have been alive if not for Maria.”
José Daniel’s death and living through the hurricane destabilized Agneris. Her anxiety and depression, until then controlled, returned in full force. She was hospitalized for five days in order for her to manage her loss. Panic attacks like the one she suffered in early February are still common in her everyday life. She said she’s functional now, but she still struggles four months after losing José Daniel.
“I have good days and bad days,” she said, her voice breaking. “But I know that as long as I recognize that I have a mental illness, and I seek help to work through that, I’m gonna have a better quality of life — even under these horrible circumstances.”
“We had the unrealistic expectation that life would normalize in the island”
Death is not the only type of loss that many Puerto Ricans have experienced in the aftermath of Hurricane Maria. For Isabel*, leaving the island 10 days after the storm is the type of loss that triggered her mental health difficulties.
The 31-year-old mother of two has never struggled with long-term mental illness. She said she suffered postpartum depression after her first pregnancy but it never got to a point where it was unmanageable. Experiencing the storm, however, changed everything.
“The day after the hurricane, my family and I went to a local shelter to help out,” she told Refinery29. “In Toa Baja, where I am from, most of the town was practically underwater. We basically spent those 10 days there before leaving the island, so I left without even seeing the conditions of my house or packing up our stuff. I had no closure.”
According to Dr. Schwartz, the researcher, people who were displaced during a natural disaster are more likely to face post-traumatic stress disorder and other symptoms.
“More specifically, people who were displaced to a temporary shelter as opposed of having friends and family to stay with,” she said. “That’s another thing to think about as it applies to Puerto Rico.”
Isabel’s family was able to relocate to Florida, but the sudden change of scenery sent her into a depression. She wasn’t able to adapt to the Sunshine State and the family packed up their bags a second time, this time heading to Arizona. That’s when the anxiety attacks began.
Illustrated by Paola Delucca.
“There’s no way to win. Those who stayed are suffering because of the situation back home. But those who left are suffering because of the circumstances under which they were forced to flee,” she said.
While her husband and two young children have been quicker to adapt to life in Arizona since they moved there in December, Isabel still struggles with the fact that this is her life now. The worst thing, she said, is the idea of not being able to go back to Puerto Rico.
“I left thinking that we would be able to return. But there’s no power, there’s no jobs, so the exodus keeps extending,” she said. “Accepting that I will never go back is one of the reasons that I’m facing issues with my mental health. We had the unrealistic expectation that life would normalize in the island, but that’s not the case.”
Isabel is undergoing treatment now, which she said is starting to help her manage her condition. But that’s only possible because with a full-time job and being the acquaintance of her doctor, she can afford it. That’s not the case for Ana, who just started a part-time job that naturally doesn’t offer health insurance. Before going to North Carolina, she illegally bought a supply of meds to last her until she’s able to pay for a doctor and treatment again.
“The only thing I didn’t get was antidepressants, because I was afraid to start on them again without a doctor’s supervision,” she said.
Struggling to get the adequate care could potentially be the situation for the thousands of Puerto Ricans that have escaped the island in the last six months without a plan in place and who have struggled to obtain healthcare since relocating stateside. It might also be the case for everyone who was left behind, particularly when considering the stigma surrounding mental illness in the island.
“We’re a far way from normalizing the conversation around mental illness,” Agneris said, “even under these circumstances.”
Isabel, Ana, and Agneris are just three of the unknown number of people who have faced mental health difficulties since Hurricane Maria. And if the focus on the six-month mark of the storm and afterwards is only on issues of infrastructure, the economy, and politics it will be a disservice to every Puerto Rican struggling to keep going.
“No one outside of Puerto Rico has any idea of how deeply the hurricane affected the mental health of people in the island. They think of the macro: The electrical grid was fucked, there’s no trees, and so on,” Ana said. “But when you’re used to so many little things — a fridge, bathing with warm water, having service on your phone — losing them will take a toll on you. No one outside of the island gets that if you’re without your basic needs for months, it’s likely you will go down a dark path. And that’s without even looking at everything else that’s wrong.”
* Names have been changed to protect their identities.
** Dr. Rebecca Schwartz is also an associate professor at the Department of Occupational Medicine, Epidemiology and Prevention in Northwell Health and the co-director of the Center for Disaster Health, Trauma and Resilience at Mount Sinai, Stony Brook, and Northwell.
Si estás enfrentando una crisis emocional, por favor llama a la Línea PAS al 1-787- 763-7575 o al 1-800-981-0023.
If you are thinking about suicide, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or the Suicide Crisis Line at 1-800-784-2433.
If you are experiencing anxiety and are in need of crisis support, please call the Crisis Call Center ’s 24-hour hotline at 1-775-784-8090.
If you are experiencing depression and need support, please call the National Depressive/Manic-Depressive Association Hotline at 1-800-826-3632 or the Crisis Call Center ’s 24-hour hotline at 1-775-784-8090.
Update: On Monday, WWD reported Kim Jones would succeed Kris Van Assche as Dior Homme’s new artistic director, beginning April 1. He will show his first menswear collection for the label in June.
“I am deeply honored to join the house of Dior, a symbol of the ultimate elegance. I would like to warmly thank Bernard Arnault and Pietro Beccari for their trust in giving me this incredible opportunity,” Jones said in a statement. “I am committed to create a modern and innovative male silhouette built upon the unique legacy of the house.”
Rumors of Jones to Dior started earlier this month, when Business of Fashion speculated the English designer would be tasked with revamping the French house's menswear business. And given his success at Louis Vuitton — from a collaboration with Supreme to his exclusive partnership with Drake — we have a feeling Dior Homme is about to look a whole lot different.
This article was originally published on January 17, 2018.
The musical chairs of creative directors and fashion houses has never been more congested, and as of Wednesday, January 17, there are more designers than the fingers on a hand in need of a new home gig. On Thursday, Kim Jones, artistic director of Louis Vuitton men's, will add his name to that list. The designer announced his departure, via WWD, which will take effect following his fall 2018 show in Paris. Cue the world's smallest violin playing for the hypebeasts across the globe.
But really, Jones departure signals the end of an era for the French maison. For the past six years, Jones, previously of British luxury goods label Dunhill, found the voice of Vuitton's men's line, adding to it his own personal flare for luxury fashion that cross-pollinates across high- and street-level trends. Jones was appointed by then-creative director Marc Jacobs in 2011, but his arguably strongest collections were those that happened most recently, from spring 2017 to now, which saw monogrammed chokers, a Supreme collaboration, and the revival of vintage motifs found on hundred-year-old trunks and cases.
"It has been a huge privilege to work with Kim," said Vuitton chairman and chief executive officer Michael Burke, in a statement confirming the news. "His ability to set trends is impeccable, and his talent and determination have ensured that Louis Vuitton is firmly placed as the leading brand in luxury men’s wear today. All of us who have been fortunate to work with Kim wish him continued success in his next venture." Considering Jones can be lauded as the mastermind behind some of the brand's most successful and mainstream collaborations, he's absolutely right. Jones echoed the statement in an Instagram post where he thanked his Vuitton team and collaborators throughout the years.
The jury is still out on his next move, but Jones' departure only adds to the rumors that've already circulated the industry pipeline, which include possible jumps to Versace or Burberry. As for his replacement, Off-White designer Virgil Abloh's name has been thrown about, though he dismisses the speculations. Until the aforementioned brands, including Vuitton, are sorted, die-hard Jones stans will no doubt spend the next season flocking to the nearest boutiques and re-sale shops to cop the lasting pieces of his historic work. And we'll be watching closely to see what he does next.
Like what you see? How about some more R29 goodness, right here?
If there’s one thing we look forward to every week, it’s curling up on the couch with a bowl of popcorn and a lineup of TV shows to binge. But who says we always have to snack on the same buttered popcorn? We teamed up with DOVE® Chocolate to take your Friday-night TV-binging game up a notch. Follow the quick steps below, and don’t forget the salt — it adds a bite best paired with your favorite sassy reality TV shows.
Ingredients
3 oz dark chocolate 2 tbsp tahini Maple syrup, optional 4 cups popped popcorn (from about 3 tbsp popcorn kernels) 1/4 cup white or black sesame seeds Flaky salt
Instructions
1. In a small bowl, melt the chocolate in the microwave in 15-second intervals, stirring between each.
2. Stir the chocolate and tahini together until smooth. Taste it; if you’d like it sweeter, add a few drops of maple syrup.
3. Lay the popcorn out on a parchment-lined baking sheet.
4. Drizzle the chocolate-tahini sauce over the popcorn. Immediately shower the popcorn with sesame seeds and flaky salt so they stick to the still-liquid chocolate.
5. Let the popcorn rest for 15 minutes at room temperature, or less in the fridge, to let the chocolate settle in.
Like what you see? How about some more R29 goodness, right here?
The Beyhive is well aware that Beyoncé, goddess of slay, is all about the Bey-nevolence. She's known to give back regularly, like when she raised funds for Hurricane Maria relief with her music, or when she doled out plates of food after Hurricane Harvey. She's also a gem because she always gives love to up-and-coming designers by pairing their styles with her couture pieces.
For the Wearable Art Gala in Los Angeles, Bey could've easily went with something sparkly from Lorraine Schwartz, her go-to jewelry designer... but instead, she supported a lesser-known designer who we'll probably be seeing a lot more from now. Bey paired her custom Falguni Shane Peacock gown with a solid gold halo band headband from Uniquely Wired M. M'Shari Whaley, the Brooklyn native behind the brand, shared a photo of Bey in the custom piece — and with some insight. It turns out, her daughter was actually supposed to wear the decoration! "We planned this for Blue Ivy, but so grateful Bey loved it and rocked it," Whaley captioned.
Hey, we can't blame the diva. It was perfect for the night's Waco to Wakanda theme, and Bey's overall aesthetic. “We wanted to create an art statement, taking inspiration from the Nubian warrior queen [Amanishakheto],” designers Falguni and Shane Peacock told WWD of her look. “We felt it was the perfect inspiration when designing for such a strong woman like Beyoncé.” Plus, the headbands are pretty affordable compared to her usual diamonds, with one as low as $80 on the Uniquely Wired M website. Totally worth the petty crime, in our eyes.
Welcome toMoney Diaries, where we're tackling what might be the last taboo facing modern working women: money. We're asking millennials how they spend their hard-earned money during a seven-day period — and we're tracking every last dollar.
Today: an accountant working in finance who makes $65,000 per year and spends some of. her paycheck this week on protein powder. Editor's note: All prices have been converted to U.S. dollars.
Occupation: Accountant Industry: Finance Age: 26 Location: Perth, Australia Salary: $65,000 Paycheck (2x/month): $1,880 Rent: $180 per week. (I live in a three-bedroom apartment with my boyfriend, and he pays $215 per week. We split everything 50/50 since our finances are not combined.)
Monthly Expenses Student Loan Payment: $300 from a U.S. savings account Gym: $205, which includes unlimited classes per month. (Yes, I know it's a lot of money, but I go pretty much every day.) Energy, Wi-Fi & Gas: ~$70 for my portion Netflix: $5.50 for my half. (I share an account with my boyfriend.) Spotify: $14 Phone: $35. (I have a pay-as-you-go monthly plan.) Watch: $395. (I bought my boyfriend a TAG Heuer watch for Christmas, and I have two more monthly payments for it. I can pay it all off now, but I would rather accrue interest in my savings account and pay monthly.) Superannuation: My company contributes 12.53% of my pre-tax wage to my retirement fund. (I currently have $35,000 saved.) Savings: I try to transfer $1,200 to my savings every month.
Day One
7:30 a.m. — Wake up for work and prep my lunch and snacks for the day. I chug a glass of warm water with lime juice and Himalayan pink salt.
8:15 a.m. — Didn't have time to eat breakfast, so I stop by my fave local joint and get a black coffee with an everything bagel and cream cheese. Bagels here are a far cry from American ones, but this is one of the best in this city and I'll take what I can get on a Monday morning. This reminds me of a bagel recipe I found on Pinterest that I want to try soon. $7.11
10 a.m. — Have my morning snack at my desk: protein shake and macadamia nuts. (I have to have five meals per day if it's a training day.)
12:30 p.m. — It's a slow time of the month at work, so I go for a short walk around the area on my lunch break and read my book. I'm trying to enjoy the summer as much as I can while it lasts.
1 p.m. — Lunch is baked chicken with frozen veggies (biggest life hack is keeping these in the freezer!) at my desk while drinking water. I do my best to drink about four liters a day because of how much I work out. As soon as I started increasing my water intake, my workouts got better.
4 p.m. — Eat my afternoon snack: yogurt, oats, apple, and protein powder mixed together.
5 p.m. — Drive home and quickly change for my HIIT class at 5:30. The gym is around the corner from my apartment, so it only takes five to 10 minutes to get there and back.
6:30 p.m. — I'm buzzing from my workout. When I get home, I tidy the house, do the dishes, and start cooking dinner (with Seinfeld playing in the background) while I wait for my boyfriend, A.*, to come back from his gym session.
8 p.m. — For dinner, we have baked barramundi fish, brown rice, and green beans. Pre-cooked rice is a lifesaver!
8:30 p.m. — I have a phone interview tomorrow morning for a new job, so I research the company and review my résumé and notes. I close out the day with my usual routine: shower, change into PJs, light a candle by my bed, brush my teeth, wash my face, and apply my serum, moisturizer, face oil, and eye cream. I've been trying to floss more, but often find it hard to remember. (Baby steps.) I'm pretty happy with how strict I've become with my face routine — I used to be horrendous and only washed my face in the shower!
Daily Total: $7.11
Day Two
7:15 a.m. — Wake up and do my usual routine. I always sleep poorly when I have a lot on my mind and if I don't get my seven to eight hours per night, I'm a zombie.
8 a.m. — I have my phone interview at home and then rush to work. Luckily, my office is a very short drive away!
8:30 a.m. — Eat breakfast at my desk with a cup of black coffee I make at work. I got hooked on these one-cup filter coffees when I recently visited family in Japan. My auntie sends me more when I run out (plus other teas and snacks I love, too).
10:30 a.m. — Usual snack of macadamia nuts and a protein shake.
1 p.m. — I eat leftover baked chicken breast with green beans for lunch, but am still feeling super tired around 2:30. I buy an iced black coffee and a large chocolate chip cookie with pistachios. The comatose feeling after is well worth it! $8.30
5:30 p.m. — Head straight to the gym after work and today I'm feeling strong. I love a good strength training session!
6:30 p.m. — Immediately rush to a Yin yoga class to stretch out my muscles and zone out after a hectic day. A good Shavasana is just what I need. It's my anniversary with the yoga studio today, so my drop-in class is free (instead of $15).
8:30 p.m. — Arrive home to dinner cooked by A. – steak, brown rice, and salad.
9:30 p.m. — In bed early to read a few pages of The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle. It's a slow read, as it takes me a while to comprehend some of his insights, but it's been sitting on my bookshelf for a year and I finally have the chance to give it a go. I put on Calm app music in the background while I'm reading. I've done Calm meditations before, but I recently discovered that the app also has sleepy time music for adults, and I'm hooked.
Daily Total: $8.30
Day Three
7:30 a.m. — Wake up from a great night's sleep. A. and I cuddle, which leads to other fun activities ... and then it's time to get ready for the day so I'm not late.
8:15 a.m. — I drop my boyfriend off at his work since it's on my way. We try to appreciate just how lucky we are with our current commutes because we know it won't last forever. It's great to have so much extra time for life instead of being stuck on public transport or in a car for long periods of time.
9:30 a.m. — I eat my breakfast at my desk but am still hungry after, so I go next door to the coffee shop and get a black coffee with my morning snack. $2.70
1 p.m. — Eat the same leftover lunch while browsing for an anniversary gift for A. I have a 20% off voucher for a luxury hotel we've been wanting to book. It's five-star and the amenities seem unreal, plus the room comes with a bottle of Champagne and late check-out! I make a reservation for $230, which I will pay upon arrival with my debit card.
1:15 p.m. — Get a text from A. that says he's secured us a new health insurance through his company. We get a 7% discount and will only have to pay $79 each per month. Our first charge won't be until next month.
3 p.m. — Payday! I recently changed banks and have a system of dividing my money into four separate accounts allocated for spending and saving. I've calculated that if I follow this new method, I'll have an extra $15,000 saved by the end of the year and will be hopefully close to paying off my loans (two of my 2018 goals).
4 p.m. — My partner and I recently became permanent residents of Australia. We're excited, but this visa status comes with a price tag. Luckily, this is my last payment of $250 until we decide to become citizens! My boyfriend owes me money from the prior week's spending, so I only transfer $100 to him and he covers our payments. $100
6:20 p.m. — Take another HIIT workout class and am exhausted afterward. I don't feel like cleaning or cooking, so I do a little bit of journaling and reading while I wait for A. to get home.
7:30 p.m. — Dinner tonight is leftover steak, green beans, and brown rice while watching the Olympics. We prep basa filets and broccoli for the next three days of lunches.
Daily Total: $102.70
Day Four
7:15 a.m. — We hit snooze again, though we had the best intentions of waking early today. We shower, pack lunches, and eat breakfast with the Olympics on in the background.
8 a.m. — Drive my boyfriend to work again and stop at the post office to pick up a package from my friend in California. She's the best!
10 a.m. — Eat the same snacks. (It may sound boring, but I rotate my foods week to week so I'm never bored.)
12:30 p.m. — I call my parents on my lunch break and we chat for a nice 30 minutes. The time difference is 16 hours, so this is usually the best time. I really miss them and California. I ask for their opinions on how to best pay off my student loans, as I have $7,000 left and need to factor in the currency exchange rate.
1 p.m. — I browse jade rollers online while eating my lunch. They're sold out everywhere I check and seem to be quite the craze these days. I think I'll save the purchase until next month anyway.
4 p.m. — Snack is yogurt, protein powder, apples, and oats. So yummy! I also update my personal finance spreadsheet, which tracks my monthly spending and saving against a budget I created.
5:30 p.m. — Weight day at the gym. I'm feeling tired and my grip strength is not good tonight.
7:15 p.m. — Write out my goals for 2018 — better late than never! I have a monthly goals book that I keep separate from my journal.
8:30 p.m. — I put on my silk face mask and earplugs, which I sleep with most nights. Then I try to read but end up falling asleep super early.
Daily Total: $0
Day Five
5:30 a.m. — Wake up early and head to the gym for an InBody scan before my morning cardio session. I pay for three scans that I'll use over the next few months. $60
6:30 a.m. — Back home, where I make my warm water concoction and heat up my brekky.
8 a.m. — Walk to work because the weather is stunning (and I'm happy to move my muscles again after this morning's session). I listen to a podcast I just discovered, Oprah's SuperSoul Conversations. All I can say is "Wow!"
9:30 a.m. — After a productive hour at work, I desperately need a coffee. I walk next door and order a flat white while resisting any extra treats. $3.50
12:30 p.m. — Read during my lunch break in a pretty park nearby. One of my goals for 2018 is to read a minimum of one book a month (I read two in January!), so this leaves me with one week to finish this book. I'm determined to read at least 20 pages per day.
1 p.m. — Last day of the basa fillet. Every day with lunch I take fish oil, magnesium, multivitamin, vitamin D3, and vitamin B complex. I also always take a probiotic after my last meal of the day (and sometimes even add in calcium and vitamin D, depending on how I'm feeling).
5 p.m. — It's the weekend! I walk leisurely and get home in about 20 minutes. Perfect amount of time to listen to another podcast, The Daily by The New York Times.
6 p.m. — Boyfriend is out having work drinks, so I decide to make myself a Dark and Stormy while trying out a new turkey taco recipe. I bake diced sweet potato and zucchini while stir-frying onion, garlic, turkey, corn, herbs, and spices. Then I combine everything and add rice and cheese. It turns out delicious and I will definitely make it again.
8:30 p.m. — I light a lavender candle and put on a face mask while I start to read. I like to keep the Olympics on mute in the background. I'm a sucker for the Olympics. When A. comes home, I make him a cocktail and we chat on the balcony for awhile. I'm going to miss summer evenings.
Daily Total: $63.50
Day Six
7:15 a.m. — Wake up and head to the gym for an amazing sweaty session – best way to kick off the weekend.
9:30 a.m.— A. and I make scrambled eggs, spinach, toast, and eat nectarines for breakfast.
10 a.m. — I only have one flavor of protein powder left (strawberry), so I order more online at a 10% discount. I buy chocolate, vanilla, and mocha, but I get a small size of the mocha one in case I don't like it. $114
11 a.m. — A. and I drive to Port Beach, about 20 kilometers south of the city. The water is crystal blue and so calm. We swim in the ocean and lay out on the soft sand.
1 p.m. — Back home, I reheat last night's leftovers for lunch. I'm exhausted from the beach, so I take a small nap while A. goes into the city to do some shopping.
7 p.m. — We pick up limes, soda water, beers, and mint leaves at the store, and then two of our friends come over before our dinner reservation. We make gin and elderflower cocktails and Dark and Stormies while chatting on the balcony. $10
8:15 p.m. — We call an Uber to take us to dinner. I'll pay for this ride because I know A. will pay for the one home. $9
8:30 p.m. — Dinner and drinks at Nobu were phenomenal. We had champagne to start and then split two bottles of wine with the meal. We had a Teppanyaki set meal, which I cannot recommend it enough! $135
11 p.m. — We go to a sports bar after dinner and have a drink while watching the Ireland vs. Wales rugby game. My friend and I are so full from the meal that we can only manage one gin and tonic each (bought by our boyfriends). The atmosphere at the bar is great, and Ireland wins with an amazing finish! Around 1 a.m., we catch a taxi back home. (A. pays.)
Daily Total: $268
Day Seven
10 a.m. — Waking up is a struggle this morning! We toss and turn for hours and then finally decide to face the day. I am always famished the morning after I drink. I try to satisfy my cravings by making healthy pancakes topped with banana, peaches, and maple syrup. A. makes his own brekky of eggs, bacon, and toast. While we eat, we watch the Olympics to enjoy the last of the events before the closing ceremony tonight.
12:30 p.m. — Leave the house to pick up a friend who's in town from Adelaide. We drive to a nearby coffee shop and talk leisurely for hours over coffee and lunch. I order a flat white with lamb bruschetta, A. orders a sandwich, and our friend gets a coffee. By the time we leave, it's 2:30. Quality catch-up time! $16
3 p.m. — We drop off our friend at the airport and stop by the store on the way home to do our food shopping for the week. We buy asparagus, zucchini, red pepper, onion, spinach, lettuce, cauliflower, cherry tomatoes, apples, bananas, ground pork, beef, turkey breast, chicken breast, snapper, barramundi, smoked salmon, grass-fed beef steak, Brazil and macadamia nuts, Greek yogurt, feta and cottage cheese, instant brown rice, sparkling water, eggs, and low-carb bread. A. and I split the groceries based on what and how much we eat. $90
7 p.m. — Once we get home from the shop, we lounge around and tidy the house, do laundry, and watch TV. We finally muster the energy to make dinner and A. whips up one phenomenal dish: pad Thai with chicken satay! I'm lucky that he is a such a great cook. After dinner, I know I should meal prep for the week, but my hangover is making me lazy. I decide to wake up early on Monday to prepare lunch instead. After watching Netflix and the closing ceremony, we finally go to bed. I'm going to miss the Olympics, but fingers crossed that I get to go to Tokyo for 2020.
Daily Total: $106
* Name has been changed for anonymity.
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In an increasingly uncertain world, there are few things we can count on. Thank the powers that be that we can still rely on Chris Hemsworth to give us a good story when it comes to character makeovers.
Last year, the actor took his hairstyle from Thor 1.0 to Thor 2.0 (that is, from a cascading, perfectly-layered cut that recalled a Legends of the Fall -era Brad Pitt to a rugged buzzcut) — and later explained the reasons for the drastic change in an on-air interview. (Yes, the amount of maintenance required to keep his luscious locks in tip-top shape had something to do with it.) Now, Hemsworth is sharing his evolution from scruffy, bearded actor to mustachioed man — a new look created for his role in an upcoming film alongside Dakota Johnson and Jon Hamm. “Tryin to find the look for Bad Times at the El Royale,” the actor captioned a video he posted to Instagram.
The clip shows Hemworth having his beard shaved in a hair-and-makeup trailer on set — first into a mutton-chop style, which he visibly disapproves of, before taking matters into his own hands. After putting his own spin on the cut, he passes the clippers back to a stylist to finish the job. The outcome? A little something that we like to call "the pornstache" nowadays.
Considering the film's setting (according to IMDB, a run-down hotel near Lake Tahoe, CA, in the 1960s), though, the style is likely to carry more of a studly every-man vibe than that of a total creep when we finally get to see it in action. Of course, we'll have to watch the movie before we can truly judge a man by his mustache, but you'll find us replaying this video just a few more times before then.
Does it matter whether we’re into the new look? Um, no. Because if there’s one thing we’ve learned from this clip, it’s that you can take a beard (or brawny hairstyle) out of a Hemsworth brother, but he’ll always have his sexy. That's not the kind of thing you can just shave away.
On Sunday, Migos — the Atlanta-based rapper group made up of Takeoff, Quavo, and Offset — premiered the video for their single “Walk It Talk It,” from their album Culture II. While it isn’t unusual for the group to lean all the way into a theme for the sake of a strong visuals (see: “Motorsport” and “T-Shirt" as proof), there was something special about how the trio was able to do it for the culture, paying homage to Soul Train, the music-dance TV show on the air for 35 years, with its own Culture Train and ‘70s-style fashion.
The video was a wonderful ode to the decadence of the decade and the trio looked the part of a funkadelic band, but according to Migos’ stylist, Zoe Costello, there wasn’t time for vision boards and custom looks. In fact, she tells Refinery29, everything came together in just three days. “It’s a little unusual,” she says, noting that things moved even quicker once everyone was on set.
Jamie Foxx makes an appearance in the video as the show’s host, as does Drake (wearing a Saint Laurent jacket over his white suit), but we're mostly impressed with the lengths Migos is willing to go to present themselves in a way we don’t usually see Black male rappers in mainstream media. They’re wearing afro wigs, white platform boots, three-piece pastel suits, and statement sunglasses. Granted, the outfits they're in are costumes, but with a few tweaks, they could easily be red carpet-ready.
The final looks of the video were very much a collaborative effort, Costello explains. Take Quavo, for instance, who said he wanted to wear ruffles. “So we kind of built a look based around the ruffles and then I suggested this denim to go with it” she sys. “It's always a collaboration. They have a very strong opinion. They have a very strong idea of what they like and they don't like which is really great.”
“We’re really trying to broaden [what people think a rapper is supposed to look like],” Costello adds. “If that makes people feel a little bit uncomfortable or whatever, it's good. They are not afraid to take risks,” she says, noting that Migos counts Prince and Michael Jackson as inspirations. “I love pulling from those [sort of] references. It’s different than what other artists and rappers are doing right now.”
Living and breathing Instagram has its drawbacks — increased likelihood of anxiety, constant FOMO, not being able to fall asleep because you just need to refresh your feed one more time — but there are two sides to every coin, and on the bright side, we can stay on top of trends better than any other generation before us. There's visual inspiration aplenty on the platform, especially when it comes to tattoos, and we're equipped to spot it all before anyone else does. The latest ink inspo on our radar? Side-boob tattoos.
The name is a bit deceiving: These tats don't necessarily need to be right on the side of a boob, but rather the general ribcage region on the side of your body. This under-appreciated real estate is intimate and unexpected, and though it's easily hidden, it's also perfect for showing off all summer long... which means now's the time to do it in advance of your first day poolside, no matter how far away that might feel.
Ahead, the best side-boob tattoos on Instagram right now, so you can officially start planning your spring and summer wardrobe around how best to show yours off.
If you like finding chances to talk about your tattoo without bringing it up yourself, placement is key, and one you'll have to translate for all your friends offers up the perfect moment to humble-brag about your new piece of art.
Butt tattoos aren't the only unexpected ink loved by celebrities: Teyana Taylor is a fan of the side-boob tattoo, too.
A minimalist heartbeat tattoo proves that not all couple tattoos have to be lame.
Tuberose isn't just one of our favorite fragrance notes (hello, Gucci Bloom): It also makes for the perfect floral tattoo.
Take it from Joan Smalls: If you're going to get one — and only one — tattoo, get it here.
Thin, monochromatic linework has been trending on social media, but we're also here for subtle washes of color, like this yellow-and-green freesia.
Looks like we're not the only ones who love pet tattoos.
Proof that larger designs can work, too.
When in doubt, choose your favorite lyrics to imprint for life.
As Jourdan Dunn proves, it's the perfect place for some peacock feathers... or anything, really.
We'll nix the obligatory Sex And the City reference, and get right to it: Cynthia Nixon has confirmed that she is running for governor of New York, challenging incumbent Gov. Andrew Cuomo. She would be the state's first female governor.
Nixon, a born-and-raised New Yorker who is best known for playing level-headed lawyer Miranda on SATC, announced her candidacy with a video posted on Twitter.
The actress is a longtime political activist and has criticized Cuomo on everything from his handling of the education budget ("He's not against public schools, but he doesn't like to pay for them.") to the pitiful state of the New York City subway. As an advocate for LGBTQ people, she has been honored with a Human Rights Campaign Visibility Award.
"New York is where I was raised and where I’m raising my kids. I’m a proud public school graduate," she says in the video. "And a prouder public school parent. I was given chances I just don’t see for New York’s kids today."
She continues: "Half the kids in our upstate cities live below the poverty line. How did we let this happen? I love New York. I’ve never wanted to live anywhere else. But something has to change."
Nixon's focus on fixing #CuomosMTA is music to many New Yorkers' ears, given that almost everyone has a story of getting stuck underground for hours while stuffed into a metal can like a sardine. The subway is, on average, slower than it was in the 1950s and delays have tripled in the past five years, according to Nixon's website. Cuomo has largely made cosmetic changes like Wi-Fi and digital displays, ignoring badly needed infrastructure work.
honestly if Cynthia Nixon runs on "I'll actually fix the fucking subway" she's got it in the bag
"Unlike Governor Cuomo, Cynthia Nixon rides the subway every day," her website says. "She understands first-hand the toll that his disastrous mismanagement of the MTA is taking on everyday New Yorkers."
In case you doubt that she rides the MTA every day, plenty of people took to Twitter to attest to this fact.
I have been stuck on the subway w Cynthia Nixon I can attest lol
In case you doubt Cynthia Nixon actually takes the subway like she does in her announcement video, I swear I rode the subway with her once. So, there's your proof. pic.twitter.com/0Gk4g9rzw9
Her campaign site emphasizes that her campaign is powered by the people. "Cynthia hasn't been bought and paid for by special interests and won't be accepting any corporate contributions."
Please, please let Nixon make #WokeCharlotte her press secretary.
In today's "maybe you should've thought that one through" news, we present the case of Carlton & United Breweries (CUB), an Australian beer company. Last month, CUB released a campaign for its new Rusty Yak Gingery Ale, taking some very misguided inspiration from the whole "ginger" part.
In the commercial (which you can watch for yourself below), the narrator describes the discovery of a "ginger" gene. "Floating around in our beer, just like it's been floating around in human DNA, surprising families for generations," he explains, pausing to show a couple holding a baby with visibly red hair.
The ad then goes one step further, actually calling on consumers to "stop the spread of the gene" by searching inside six packs of beer for hidden bottles marked with a special label. According to CUB, it was supposed to be a "fun" marketing campaign — and a way for Australians to win some cash — but it quickly backfired once consumers called out the racist undertones of the advertisement.
“It’s very offensive for the advertisement to be discriminating against those with red hair, suggesting that they need to ‘stop the gene spreading’ as if it were some sort of disease," read one complaint to the Advertising Standards board, as reported by the Australia media news site Mumbrella. "Children already get bullied at school for having red hair, and advertisements like this only further encourage that type of bullying."
According to Mumbrella, CUB released a statement defending the ad saying, “The advertisements do not promote discrimination or vilification as defined above in a literal or figurative way given the theme and overall impression of the advertisements is not negative towards reds heads (sic), but rather a humorous and comical announcement that we have discovered ‘the ginger gene’ in our beer."
Except... it's not. As determined by the Advertising Standards board and reported by Yahoo, “The phrase ‘stop the spread of the gene’ overstepped the line between being light-hearted humor and made a strong suggestion that an identifiable group of the population was to be considered unpopular." The panel also noted that DNA can be considered to be related to ancestry and descent, and therefore red hair falls within the definition of race. CUB, though it disagreed with the ruling, complied and pulled the ad from television.
There are plenty of ways to be clever and draw consumers in. Throwing a thin veil over discrimination isn't one of them.
Pretend for a moment that you don't know the names Cate Blanchett, Jennifer Lopez, or Kerry Washington. Imagine you ran into one of them on the street, when they were out of their couture gowns and loaner diamonds and wearing jeans and ponytails. You'd probably still do a double-take, right? And we bet you'd think: She's rich.
How would you know? The skin. Skin is what really separates the A-listers from the mortals. And it makes sense: they have access to the best of the best — derms, facialist treatments, products — and it shows in the form of bright, even, luminous complexions. (Just ask Alicia Keys.)
But the good news is that you can have expensive-looking skin, too — for cheap. All it takes is commitment and a bit of research, which we've gladly done for you. So, actually, all it takes is clicking through this slideshow, then hitting "add to shopping cart," then parting with a tiny amount of money. Now you just need the personal chef and closet dedicated solely to shoes and you're practically headed to the Oscars.
Spend: Micellar Water Like it or not, micellar water is the cleanser du jour for Francophiles, frequent fliers (because you should not be splashing your complexion with plane water), and sensitive skin types. This one removes your longest-lasting makeup gently and has a subtle rose scent, which makes for an especially nice touch.
Lancôme Eau Fraiche Douceur Micellar Cleansing Water, $39, available at Sephora.
Save: Micellar Water If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it — or spend way more money on it than you need to. This French drugstore classic, arguably the micellar water that started it all, wasn’t always easy to find in the US. Now, it’s readily available stateside, and the ideal price to be purchased in bulk.
Bioderma Sensibio H2O Micelle Solution, $14.90, available at Amazon.
Spend: Dry Skin Moisturizer This 30% hyaluronic acid cream has one of the most magical textures we've ever touched — and we've touched a hell of a lot of creams. It looks thick and white in the jar, but as soon as it hits your skin, it becomes as thin and invisible as water. Then, seconds later, it's gone without a trace. The only evidence is how healthy and hydrated your skin feels as the day progresses.
Peter Thomas Roth Water Drench Hyaluronic Cloud Cream, $52, available at Sephora.
Save: Dry Skin Moisturizer It's rare to find a cream that works across the board for oily skin, extra-dry skin, and sensitive skin, but this fragrance- and- oil-free gel packed with hyaluronic acid and moisturizing olive extract makes the cut.
Neutrogena Hydro Boost Water Gel, $19.99, available at Ulta Beauty.
Spend: Brightening Eye Cream The diamond dust in this formula gives dull skin and dark circles an instant, highlighter-effect boost, while herbs and plant extracts work to plump and smooth the area over time.
Tata Harper Illuminating Eye Crème, $95, available at Sephora.
Save: Brightening Eye Cream Daisy blossom extract, a proven brightening powerhouse, is the hero ingredient of this gentle eye cream.
Burt's Bees Brightening Eye Treatment, $19.99, available at Target.
Spend: At-Home Peel This box has enough peels to last you two months if you use them as recommended (twice a week). And considering the heavy-duty dose of vitamin C and glycolic acid in each, we'd say that's a worthy purchase if you're concerned with dark spots and uneven texture.
Murad Rapid Resurfacing Peel, $44, available at Sephora.
Save: At-Home Peel If your skin is easily irritated, opt for this gentler glycolic peel, which can be used daily at night after cleansing.
L'oréal Revitalift Bright Reveal Peel Pads, $19.99, available at Ulta Beauty.
Spend: Night Cream This night cream feels like it's working moments after you massage it in; by the time you wake up, you're noticeably glowier than you were eight — or four — hours prior.
Dior Capture Totale Intensive Night Restorative Crème, $175, available at Sephora.
Save: Night Cream This is a must for fast winter skin repair, but a word to the wise: Apply the rich cream an hour before hitting the pillow (avoiding the eyes) to give it ample time to sink in.
Boots No. 7 Protect & Perfect Intense Night Cream, $24.99, available at Ulta Beauty.
Or Try...
If you're suffering from stubborn acne scars and a fancy schmancy cream just won't do, Dr. Joshua Zeichner, a New York based dermatologist, suggest finding a cream with anti-inflammatory ingredients like retinol. "Retinol is perhaps the best studied anti-aging ingredient we have," he tells us. "By stimulating collagen, it helps improve the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles. But be careful, because it can cause significant skin irritation in the first two to four weeks."
Neutrogena Rapid Wrinkle Repair Night Moisturizer, $21.99, available at Ulta Beauty.
Spend: Face Scrub This cult-favorite, brown-sugar-and-strawberry-seed blend makes us crave cinnamon rolls whenever we frost it over our face.
Fresh Sugar Face Polish, $62, available at Sephora.
Save: Face Scrub If St. Ives' original apricot scrub was too aggressive for you, this new exfoliator should hit the sweet spot. It's got coconut shells to buff away dead cells and coconut and grapeseed oil to coddle everything else.
St. Ives Exfoliate & Nourish Coconut Oil Scrub, $6.99, available at Target.
Spend: Purifying Mask For a deep, oil-sucking clean, wash all your makeup off, do a quick steam if you're feeling indulgent, then smooth this on. In 10 to 15 minutes, the clay and charcoal combo will seriously diminish the amount of sebum and dirt building up in your pores.
Origins Clear Improvement, $26, available at Origins.
Save: Purifying Mask This little, single-use pod fits in the palm of your hand and still manages to pack in charcoal and clay (for drawing out the bad stuff), oatmeal and aloe juice (for calming), and tea tree oil (for keeping bacteria away).
nügg Charcoal Skin Detox Face Mask, $3.99, available at nugg Beauty.
Spend: Sensitive Skin Cream This heavy cream is the Holy Grail for those with special snowflake skin that freaks out the second it senses wind or cold or added fragrance. How do you know it'll do you right? It's 100% sterile and safe to use on babies and burn victims.
Avène Skin Recovery Cream, $34, available at Derm Store.
Save: Sensitive Skin Cream Cotton isn't just your best bet for comfy tees and underwear, the fluffy white plant also treats your skin with the utmost TLC when it's built into your moisturizer.
Yes To Cotton Comforting Facial Moisturizer, $14.99, available at Ulta Beauty.
Spend: Sunscreen Yes, it’s pricy, but this luxurious sunscreen is beloved for its lightweight, invisible finish and the silky smooth canvas it leaves behind. Perfect for wearing alone or under makeup, skin is left looking and feeling as fresh as it gets.
Tatcha Silken Pore Perfecting Sunscreen Broad Spectrum SPF 35 PA+++, $65, available at Sephora.
Save: Sunscreen Perfect for breakout-prone and sensitive skin, this sunscreen is oil-free and has colloidal oatmeal to soothe your face and body in the sun.
Aveeno Protect + Hydrate Lotion Sunscreen Broad Spectrum SPF 30, $6.49, available at Target.
Spend: Cleansing Device We love the smaller version of the Clarisonic — the gold standard for getting your face squeaky-clean — because it's ideal for travel and has a delicate speed setting for days we need to take it easy.
Save: Cleansing Device We challenge you to find a better, cheaper tool that erases every trace of makeup and dirt with a brush on one side and exfoliates with a silicone pad on the other. Hint: You can't.
elf Cleansing Duo Face Brush, $14, available at e.l.f Cosmetics.
Spend: Acne Treatment The rollerball on this salicylic acid treatment makes application easy and mess-free — just remember to wipe it clean after every use to avoid spreading bacteria.
Estée Lauder Clear Difference Targeted Blemish Treatment, $35, available at Bloomingdales.
Save: Acne Treatment Refinery29 beauty assistant Sam Sasso swears by this drugstore spot treatment that goes on clear, without any stickiness, and takes down pimples overnight.
Clean & Clear Advantage Acne Spot Treatment, $6.39, available at Ulta Beauty.
Spend: Retinol Retinol can be irritating, which is why derms warn that you should always ease in and build up your tolerance, but this one offers a workaround. It's got seaweed extract and hyaluronic acid in the creamy formula, so it'll never make you red or flaky.
Kate Somerville Retasphere 2-in-1 Retinol Night Cream, $85, available at Sephora.
Save: Retinol Almost every derm we've asked agrees: RoC is the leader in wrinkle prevention at the drugstore. Get to the bottom of the tube on this one and you'll see firmer, smoother skin and diminished crow's feet and smile lines.
RoC Deep Wrinkle Night Cream, $24.99, available at Ulta Beauty.
Or Try...
Yes, the price tag on this looks too good to be true, but stay with us. “The formula contains 1% retinol, which is better than using an undisclosed bargain-basement potency that’s sold on the cheap,” Randy Schueller, co-founder of The Beauty Brains, says. “Water is cheap. You could put retinol in a water-based cream or serum, but that would be a big red flag — and put the retinol at risk. This 1% formulation does not contain water. They’re taking the right approach. The science seems reasonable. In terms of finding a solid candidate at a very good price, I'd feel good about recommending [it]."
The Ordinary Retinol 1%, $6.70, available at Ordinaries.
Spend: Brightening Treatment SK-II's secret Pitera sauce works magic on dark spots and areas of discoloration. This spin-off of the classic essence feels more substantial — it's more of a serum than a water — and delivers results in just a few weeks. Plus, all you need is a pump or two for your entire face.
SK-II GenOptics Aura Essence, $240, available at SK-II.
Save: Brightening Treatment This toning concentrate boosts your moisturizer's effectiveness, helping to drive the active ingredients deeper into your skin. Just massage a few drops of it on after cleansing, then layer your day or night cream on top.
Olay Luminous Miracle Boost Concentrate, $23.99, available at Target.
Spend: Depuffing Eye Patches When an eye gel manages to look this chic and hide the fact you slept no more than four hours last night — after just 10 minutes of using it — you know you've found a worthy investment.
Guerlain Super Aqua-Eye Anti-Puffiness Smoothing Eye Patch, $132, available at Sephora.
Save: Depuffing Eye Patches The combo of soothing cucumber and licorice root extract are a surefire way to look wide awake — for less than you'd spend on a latte.
Soap & Glory Puffy Eye Attack Hydrogel Patches, $5, available at Walgreens.
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